Possible future boss: I don't believe any of that. Seen lots of old smokers. But you never see any very old fat people... [PS: $WTW #1 on $craper. I don't make this shit up. Jesus does...]

So when this fat lady hit the floor at Applebees on a 911 last night, realized I have to re-learn the words to a bunch of old songs.

Also, I'm sorry Cosmopolitan says pretty, warrior women's pelvic floors hurt. Hers doesn't, probably because five babies...